A Friend Who Turned Water to Wine

Reflection #69: Remembering the miraculous joyful alchemy of our departed friend

Jesus' first miracle was turning water into wine at a wedding in Cana and through the symbolism of that act, he sent a powerful message about the importance of friends in our life’s journey.

Weddings, of course, are full of friends. A friend is someone who does what they can to help, even when true solutions are beyond their power. A friend is someone who will fill the jugs with water, even when they think you’re crazy, because what you need isn’t water, it’s wine.

I’ve come to believe that we focus far too much on the literal stories of scripture and not enough on the metaphorical meaning of these stories. Jesus taught in parables because fiction contains greater and deeper levels of truth than historical fact, for those with the discernment to see such truths. In Mark chapter four, Jesus explained that he utilized parables to reveal spiritual truth to those who were ready to receive such truth, but also, to conceal his message from those who were not ready to receive it. He gave us a hint about this truth elsewhere when he said, “The Kingdom of Heaven is within you.”

With that in mind, all stories in scripture, even if they are literal, can also be considered parables about how to unlock true peace, joy, love, and creativity within our lives — how to unlock the Kingdom within. Such an understanding of scripture-as-parables teaches us how to have true life, and have it more abundantly.

So here’s what the water-to-wine story teaches me: The wine represents the wholesome good times of life, the love of friends, the laughter of fellowship, and the grace of the spirit.

Without wine, the wedding couple faced only embarrassment and difficulties. They faced problems to be overcome. Without wine, the wedding represented our worries, our anxieties, and our despair when everything seems to have gone wrong and the light of life has run out leaving us facing only darkness and the dirt of life.

And that’s exactly when a true friend steps up simply to be there with you.

By stepping up, our friends cleanse us. They fill us with purifying water. They share the water of life with us and even stand by our side to draw out more water together. With that water, they help us wash life’s ‘dirt’ away.

And, somehow, once our inner state (represented by the water jugs) is sufficiently cleansed by this water, through the fellowship of true friends, and through the miracle of the divine Christ that connects us all, the simple act of sharing the water of life together, with friends, sweetens it. It brings back the life. It brings back the light. And such sharing turns our water into a flagon of spiritual wine from which we are able to drink deeply.

I reflect upon these thoughts today, because I’m thinking of my friend Kevin, who after a battle with melanoma, tragically passed away in December at far, far too young of an age.

For my wife and I, Kevin and his wife Lucy are those friends who cleanse us. They are the friends who bring forth the spiritual wine of life.

This idea somehow seems fitting as I think about Kevin – when I think of how much actual wine we've shared together.

We became wine connoisseurs together and polished off many bottles of the good stuff over music, food and conversation – not just for the sake of drinking (though we certainly indulged at times!), of course, but for the fellowship; for the light he always brought into our lives, even in those times we struggled with darkness; especially in the times we struggled.

When Kevin walked (or danced) into the room — water became wine. Just like that. That is what people mean when they utter the phrase, “he had a smile that would light up the room.” I can picture his smile as I write this, and I realize that, even now, he’s putting a smile on my face.

In fact, the last time we saw him, we opened a new bottle of Seasmoke Southing (2022) and, as Kevin tasted it, a huge surprised grin crossed his face and he looked at us and said, “wow, that is so f*ing good!”

Kevin almost never used the f-bomb, choosing to reserve it for special emphasis, so we know he meant it wholeheartedly.

I’m glad the last wine we were able to share with him was one that brought him joy as Kevin, himself, was usually the joy-bringer.

That’s how it was with Kevin. When we shared an evening with Kevin and Lucy, the troubled waters of our lives turned instantly, miraculously, into spiritual wine. We shared laughter, we shared music, we shared dancing (Oh! How he loved to dance!), we broke bread and enjoyed companionship around many dinner tables.

And, together, through Kevin’s joie de vivre, his love of wine, his easy smile, and his readiness, eagerness even, to dance, we experienced the sacred alchemy of turning the lead of this difficult life into precious moments of spiritual gold that I will cherish for the rest of my life.

Jesus said, “I came so that you may have life, and have it more abundantly.”

And with his first miracle in Cana, He showed us how to turn the suffering of life into spiritual wine – find a friend like Kevin. And, through infectious joy, together, you will miraculously turn water into wine.

I miss you, Kevin. And my life is better for having you in it.

Rest, or dance, or whatever you want to do in peace, my friend.

“I came that they may have life, and have it more abundantly” — Christ, John 10:10