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Susan Helen Strok's avatar

Well, you just so perfectly described the torture of not creating, when creating is the very heart of our deepest soul, truly our basic reason for even living. I am an artist - drawing and painting - but the creative soul is the same. When I cannot have the space and time to paint, I become very depressed and yes, bitchy. Living alone, I have no-one to take it out on. thank goodness. But here is the bottom, basic truth - the creator (me) has to give myself "permission" to paint. Yes, I have to believe that my painting is more important than organizing my office, washing the dirty floor, even mourning the death of a loved one. But when one gets depressed, we are often mean to ourselves. That monster appears and says that you cannot paint, no-one likes your work anyway, you are nothing. Eventually, we DO create. And kick that monster out. And then, like magic-light, love, and happiness return to our battered soul. Create like crazy! Keep that monster in place! And of most importance - love thyself!

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Susan Drawbaugh's avatar

I read this entire piece because it was so well written! And so true! I’m an illustrator and I know what you’re talking about. If I’m not creating, I’m feeling a huge void. Thank you so much for sharing your fantastic writing!

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