The Courage to Find Your Self
Reflection #81: What we can learn embracing our unique weirdness from the parable of the talents
In the parable of the talents, Jesus tells his followers that The Kingdom of Heaven will be like a man going on a journey. The man entrusted three servants to take care of his talents (money). The first two servants doubled the money entrusted to them, an outcome for which they were praised and rewarded. But the third servant simply buried his talent for safekeeping, yet he was rebuked, called wicked, and cast into outer darkness. Ouch.
This parable is often thought of as being about wealth. And indeed the word “talent” at that time in the ancient world did mean a large sum of money. A ‘talent’ was about 80 pounds of silver. As I write this today a 'talent' would be worth about $45,000.
However, Jesus spoke in parables for a reason. And that reason was to impart deeper meaning to those who were spiritually ready to hear the true message behind his words.
By speaking in parables he simultaneously planted a seed of contemplation in those who were not ready to understand his message, while unveiling profound spiritual truths to those who were ready. This is what he meant when he said, “he who has (spiritual) ears, let him hear.”
If we consider the parable of the talents to be only about money, it seems pretty harsh. The poor third servant was not a financial adviser; he likely was terrified of losing the master’s money and so he reasonably did not risk it. Imagine his surprise when the master returns, rebukes him, calls him worthless, and casts him into outer darkness!
If a person of authority gave you a fifty thousand dollars and said, "take care of this for me until I get back," wouldn't you be tempted to just put it into FDIC backed interest-bearing accounts so you didn't lose the money? That poor servant wasn't a hedge fund manager, so what was he supposed to do? And the master praised the two servants who took large risks with the money and got lucky with 100% returns! The two reckless servants were praised and the prudent one was rebuked. I always feel sorry for that third guy.
In fact, the whole surface-level interpretation of this parable being about money seems ridiculous. And that is our clue that the parable isn't really about money.
Instead, it's about wealth. True wealth. Specifically, it's about spiritual wealth. The kind of wealth I referenced when I wrote about soulful attention vs egoistic attention.
Our divine master has provided all of us with unique forms of spiritual wealth. These may be natural talents in art, math, science, dance, music, philosophy or any other subject.
But our true spiritual wealth is found a bit deeper than just looking for "what we're good at."
For example, I'm good at accounting, but I hate it and find it soul killing. Our spiritual wealth is uncovered by listening to the whisper that calls our true name. It is uncovered by that feeling we experience when we chase wonder; the enthusiasm we feel when we hear the call of inspired curiosity.
“My music is the spiritual expression of what I am - my faith, my knowledge, my being.” — John Coltrane
After we hear the call, God awaits our response. What happens next depends upon our heart’s response-ability. The next step is our responsibility.
That quiet voice in the wilderness of our chaotic minds is the divine mystery calling to us, saying "follow me." And when we do follow, we intuitively find those things that we are supposed to be doing. We know that we are on the correct path when the things we do feel deeply right; when they feel wholesomely good. This how I knew accounting wasn’t for me — it didn’t feel right or good (for me). Listening to that transcendent whisper helps us discover who we truly are. It's an intuitive knowing.
Our talents are found in embracing our uniqueness; by embracing our weirdness; by embracing our destiny (which is what weird means). Our talents are the “weird” things that fill us with enthusiasm, which means filled with God. Our weirdness is our creativity. It is the unique creative prism through which the pure divine light of creation is filtered to create the kaleidoscope of colors that illuminate the way to our destiny. Our weirdness points the way to our true talents. And when we pursue our true talents, the ones the master entrusted to us, we are filled with God and we increase our spiritual wealth.
In the parable, the servants who doubled their entrusted talents are allowed to keep them, and are promised even more. But the servant who buried his talent? Even that was taken from him and given to the servant who had made the most of his talents: If we don’t follow the call, when inspiration strikes, that inspiration will be given to someone else.
To turn away from this wondrous call, to bury our ‘weirdness,’ and to instead follow what the world of conformity wants of us is the true meaning of "burying our talents."
Indeed, most of us have buried our talents in the modern world. If I had become an accountant, it would have been a “responsible,” well-paying path. It would have been the kind of path this modern world encourages people to follow.
“You can always write as a hobby in your spare time," the worldly minded will tell you. Several people told me, while I was building my software company for visual artists, that it wouldn’t work. They had quite convincing and rational reasons. But growing your soul by following your talents is an irrational pursuit that requires a leap of faith.
If you listen to the world, you’ll follow the rational path, and you’ll be like the rich young man who wouldn’t give up his possessions to follow Jesus. He, rationally, kept his worldly possessions, but ended up sorrowful. And so it goes, little by little, we listen to those we respect and we start suppressing the call of wonder until we've buried our talents so deeply that we almost forget they are there. But, like the rich young man, doing this traps us in the sorrowful world of angst, and that world is hell.
We bury our talents beneath a hard shell of trauma that encases our heart so we don’t have to feel the pain of our willful ignoring of the call of God. And then we distract ourselves with doomscrolling, news, drugs, status games, and sex.
We simply have to look around to see what this has done to modern humans. People are full of angst. Everyone is angry. Crime abounds. Wars are escalating.
We inhabit a world of eight billion unique amazing divine creative beings and we spend our time mostly killing, enslaving, stealing and arguing with each other while our talents lay buried in the earth awaiting the master’s return.
In this state we have buried our talents under the earth — under the weight of the world and its “reasonable” demands and under the weight of our ego’s earthly desires — and thus, we cannot enter the Kingdom. We are cast into the outer darkness of the outer world. When we think only the outer world is real, we are separated from the deeper Truth of the transcendent kingdom within; we have lost our Poetic glasses of Creativity which reveal to our eyes the true Beauty of the world around us.
But the good news, the God spell that renews this world, is that wonder is a divine wound breaks through that shell around our hearts and lets the refreshing light illuminate us again. When wonder “breaks through”, we have put those Poetic glasses back on, and the world, again, comes to Life. We were blind, but now we see.
So, if we follow wonder when we feel it, we allow enthusiasm, the filling up with god, to enrich our soul again.
This takes courage.
Courage derives from the french word for heart: cour. To find one’s cour-age is to be heart-led. To enter courage is to enter the “heart-led age.” This courageous opening up allows the light, the life — the logos — into our heart.
Those few who find the courage follow the divine call of wonder and enter their heart-led age will find that new pathways quickly open to them.
People who answer the call of their personal hero's journey often tell stories about how quickly the entire world seemed to line up behind them with coincidences, chance meetings, and synchronicities as soon as they found the courage to take the first steps.
Seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.” — Christ, Matthew 6:33
These incidents, where the universe seems to support your talents, are your validations to keep going. This is the “trading with the talents” that the two praised servants engaged in.
You see, the “master” in the story is our “true self.” He is our spiritual center. He is our Christ Consciousness. He is the right hemisphere of our brain. And the servants are disparate parts of of our psyche. The good servant, who multiplied the talents the most, is the part of the man that followed the divine call of wonder home to the True Self within.
And the more we find our cour-age, the more we allow our heart to lead us toward the things that fill us with God – the things that fill us with enthusiasm and inspiration – the more our minds will rewire themselves until we are completely filled with The Kingdom of heaven, the True Self, The Sovereign Artist within.
That is when the master, the divine creative song of the universe, the Christ Consciousness within says, “Well done, good and faithful servant…enter into the joy of your master.”
And so, through mustering the courage to find our true Self, we follow the call of our talents, our true name, by which we enter into the joy of the Kingdom.
God breathes through us so completely...
so gently we hardly feel it...
yet, it is our everything.
— John Coltrane
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This reflection is an excerpt from the section on courage in my forthcoming book, The Sovereign Artist.
Inside of each of us lies a divine force - The Sovereign Artist Within - a remarkable force which brings joy, peace, creativity and love back into our lives. This approach to the creative process saved me, and it can save you too, perhaps it can save us all. Connecting with The Sovereign Artist manifests as an explosion of creativity, peace, and quiet inner joy. It transforms the artist into a reflection of itself - sovereign, free, joyful and loving. If that is of interest, please click the button below to join the book’s waitlist.
Referenced Posts:
The Attention Deficit
We have created an energy deficit by paying the world with too much of our egoistic attention and by not engaging in the re-creation of soulful attention.
The Call of Wonder
“I really feel in tune with your reflections in this article, and in all the ones I've read up till now. I can see myself in the mirror of your words as if I have written them or at least thought about them in the same way. The connection to the deepness of your soul that I can sense, makes me feel I'm not alone in my quest.” — Vito Acosta
I Never Even Called Me By My Name
“Thank you for this! This resonates so much. I heard God call me a surfer once. I didn't understand but over time, I see it's who I am - I love catching and riding spiritual waves.” — Eugene Terekhin, Philosophy of Language
Modernity is Hell
This reads like a psalm for the soul-sick—equal parts lament and luminous call to awaken. Clintavo has pierced the veil of modernity’s hollow comforts and pointed straight to the aching heart beneath our concrete sprawl. Beauty is the battleground, and wonder is the rebellion. In a world addicted to numbness, feeling anything sacred is a revolutionary act. — Aleksander Constantinoropolous
The Mystery
I’m not sure who you are channeling but it is true and I’m being enriched by your work. You are a wise soul and I appreciate you. — Ed Penniman
The Opposite of Depression
Awesome post. Never thought about creativity like this--though I've been trying without success to put a finger on what art does for some time now . . . You just put a finger on it exactly. Very well done, and thank you for sharing! — Ryan Barry
The God Spell
Love to you Clint in exposing truth to readers. Very well thought out words, sifted through the mind and soul of that one known as Clintavo, that one small but unique piece of the holistic puzzle called life. — Louanne Headrick
No AI Zone: Everything written in this post (and all my posts) is written 100% by me, Clint “Clintavo” Watson, a flesh and blood human seeking to grow my soul and come home my truest self; for that is the essence of creativity. I do not use AI to assist me with writing — that would deny me the very growth of my world through writing that I seek.
Poetic expression, spiritual ideas, and musings upon beauty, truth and goodness should be free to spread far and wide. Hence, I have not paywalled the work on this site. However, if you’re able to become a paid subscriber, I’d be eternally grateful. It would help, encourage and enable me to continue exploring these topics and allow me to keep it accessible for a world that is in desperate need of beauty, truth, goodness and love. — Creatively, Clintavo.
I really enjoyed reading your post. In the 1990’s I did a lot of inner work through “the Artist Way” by Julia Cameron. When I took a leap of faith of starting a decorative painting business (feeling it was the right path) the opportunities completely stopped. I was devastated thinking did I get it wrong. But I persevered. It slowly grew and evolved. Just wasn’t immediate. I always try to listen to my inner path. I thank you for writing this. Look forward to your book.
How much I needed to read this! It’s odd stumbling across this post now — I don’t ever have time or headspace or solid footing to read much beyond brief blurbs in posts. What allowed me to be on this page today? I am in great turmoil and am experiencing things that are shaking my very existence. I have prayed more and more, I have started feeling, seeing, hearing, sensing God’s presence at times when I need it the most — when I am spinning around in a sometimes daily vortex and drowning in it. I went from hearing a calling once or twice a year to every few months to every Sunday and now to almost every day. Something is happening, and I read this and finally fully appreciate the meaning of the parable of the talents.